Chaos Love: love, life, design and more.

This time with Cam in tow, we had an ultrasound which was much clearer than only two weeks before. The head and little stub arms were visible as well as the tiny heartbeat going the rate of a squirrels. The tech measured the heart rate to make sure it was regular and checked around the area to make sure nothing else strange was growing near the fetus. Lastly, she let us hear the heartbeat through the equipment and sure enough the thing was beating away making us realize that this being was now on it's own, making its own blood, making its own journey from here on out. We just had to guide it and nurture it and see how it shapes out. Now having two hearts in my body, I was still a bit foggy how the machine was able to determine that one little beating organ from the other dominate one. Cam on the other hand was going through a life changing epiphany complete with shivers and a momentous sense of awe.

From there we were then directed to the examination room where I met my substitute doctor as my original OB was on vacation(?) The new doc was extremely personable and made us laugh throughout my poke-and-prod exam. From there we sat with him in his office as he put on the serious doctor face and gave us the low down of what to expect in the next few months. There were tests to be taken, if elected, including a Nucheal Translucency to test for Down syndrome and a Cystic Fibrosis Carrier test. Both sounded like the chances were slim but risky if not caught early. He went over meds I could take and drugs I should stop taking (cocaine and meth will be the hardest) but I felt like I had already been educated in most of the topics due to some heavy book reading in the past couple of weeks. Cam, of course absorbed the info like a sponge and was so glad that he came along. I thanked Dr. F as I was so grateful for his welcoming attitude and cool demeanor. Unfortunately, I could not betray my original OB and switch teams, not because of loyalty, but because she was the only one who would travel to my insured hospital for the delivery. C'est la vie! As Dr. F is in the same clinic though, its nice to know that he is there, always looking out for patients whose regular docs are on vacation.

Meanwhile, Cam is taking care of me in the best way he knows how. His support is through the roof and I couldn't be any luckier. And as for the gummy bear, you don't know it yet, but you're pretty lucky too.

My first appointment to the doctor produced these results with the ultrasound. The technician seemed disgruntled at her findings as the details are difficult to make out. I pointed this out to her and expressed, I was more than thrilled to see what she was seeing. However, I am still a bit disappointed at the quality of ultrasounds as I feel technology should have developed a bit better by now, being a futuristic year of 2010, to be able to see a 2mm speck in my uterus as clearly as if was being featured on BBCs Planet Earth. But alas, its still grainy black and white and we see a large black blob, being the yolk, with a tiny arrow (not part of the fetus unfortunately) pointing to what should be the important developing bits.

My technician didn't seem to be enjoying her job when I couldn't think of anything more exciting to do every day. No worry though, my bubbliness will see me through this, until I met up with my doctor.

She meets me in her office and looks over my chart. With an intense glare, she demands why I haven't been in in the last year for a check up on a procedure I had back in late 2008. Good question. My excuses are meager, like having no idea that she wanted me to come back for a check up. There could be complications down the road if I have any high level CIN squamous cells left in my cervix she explains. I agree, that should be made a priority for my health that this be taken care of. We make an appointment for two weeks from the day and she leaves the room. Kind of left in a shock, I leave the office wondering what I should be more concerned about: my doctor being furious at me, or me just being happy because the appointment was indeed a success. To be continued...